"Very good afternoon. Welcome back to this program. We are, as you well know, "Everything you ever wanted to know about Minesweeper and never dared to ask." And we started, without dilación, presentando a nuestro primer invitado de hoy. Sentado junto a mí se encuentra el hombre que, sin duda, más veces ha muerto jugando al Buscaminas. Déjenme que les presente a El Impenitente. Buenas tardes, señor Impenitente.
-Buenas tardes.
-¿Me permite que le llame Impe o de alguna manera abreviada?
-¿Me permite que me cague en sus muelas y en toda su parentela?
-No.
-Pues lo mismo.
-Está bien, señor Impenitente. Empecemos por el principio. ¿Cuándo comenzó a jugar usted al Buscaminas?
-Es difícil de precisar. Comencé con el Carta Blanca pero me aburría porque siempre ganaba. Then I moved to Minesweeper and I'm bored because I never win.
"And do not play anything else?
-No.
- Why?
"Because I'm an obsessive guy.
- Is considered a freak of Minesweeper?
-No. Freak is someone who has an obsession than ours or that, when sharing ours is more obsessed than us. And I know a guy ("I can give names, Z.?) That is more obsessed than me. Freak he is. I am the moderation personified.
"And what technique you use to play Minesweeper? Do you play in a clockwise, counterclockwise, from north to south, at random?
-Mi técnica parte de la intuición pero está profundamente fundamentada. Es una técnica infalible.
-¿Cómo que infalible? Pero, ¿no dice que muere siempre?
-Sí, pero no es culpa mía.
-Entonces, ¿de quién es?
-Pues depende. Si muero por el flanco derecho he sido derrotado por el General Invierno y contra él no se puede luchar. Si muero por el flanco noroeste yo mandé a mi armada a luchar contra las minas, no contra los elementos. Si muero por el sur la culpa es de Rommel, que es un zorro. Y si no se me ocurre nada, pues le echo la culpa a Raúl. O al Boggie. Culpa mía desde luego no es.
-Ah. Bueno, explíquenos technique.
"My art is intuitive but always subjecting intuition to reason. Or not. Minesweeper game actually like playing chess. I meditate every move. Reflect. I think. Do probabilistic calculations. And so I'm not completely sure the box under no.
- What time?
- What time?
"It's supposed Minesweeper game is completed in the shortest possible time.
- No kidding! What do you want, I will not make that up?
-Man, I do want, I just want you to win sometime.
- Win. What a beautiful word. What is winning? Is not the concept overrated win in this society of ours?
"Come with no hope none of you ever get to complete.
"I'm on it. I'm on it. I have noticed great progress lately. But if you want to tell you the truth, I do not see. I do not look feasible. You might say that I am proud to be the man who has died more times playing Minesweeper, but I would trade everything to gain ever, if only one.
"If you ever get it let us know because we will invite you back to the program to tell us your impressions.
"You will not need to tell them. Hear a ferocious scream. Be me. Have no doubt.
"Well, that makes me happy. Thank you very much and good afternoon.
"Thank you. Good afternoon.
0 comments:
Post a Comment